Hood Rich: Champagne Dreams on a Shoestring Budget

 Got a quarter tank of gas 

In my new E Class

  But that’s alright

 Cause I’m gone shine

  Got everything

  In my mama name

    But I’m hood rich

   La-da-da

Translation (for those not so urban): Projecting an image of success or power that you really have not attained by showing off material goods such as cars or houses in an effort to impress those around you. Sacrificing things you NEED in order to afford/or at least look like you can afford the things you WANT.

Trust me when I tell you, that if you don’t know anyone in your life living HOOD RICH read a little further and partake in this family reunion.

Welfare Queens - These are the “professional mothers” who pump out kids in order to reap the public benefit that is, government assistance. You know the ones who depend on food stamps, Medicare/medicaide, child care placement and HUD (Section-8 housing) to provide for their families. You have probably seen these queens in the grocery store buying crab legs and shrimp, or maybe even trying to sell you their food stamps in exchange for cash-in-hand.

Child Support Fiends- You know the ones that come to court in their Forever 21 suits talking about how they are struggling just to make, when in actuality they are a welfare queen. They are the ones who are always talking about how no good their baby father is and stay posted at the mailbox to insure that they receive their child support check on time. “Well, it’s for the betterment of the child.” In some cases yes, but what about those individuals out there who stay with their nails and hair done, while their kids walk around looking like they came straight out of one of those Feed the Children commercials.

Diddy Boppin Reject- These are the brothers who are popping Rosé in the club, only to go home to an empty apartment with a mattress on the floor. You know the ones ladies, talk a big game about how he can do this for you and take you there, but this fool ain’t ever been out the state. The ones with the glass, wannabe diamond, necklaces that have to wait for their partner to get off work before they can go anywhere. The one with the nice car that he can’t park at his house because the repo man is lurking.

While some people may read this and think “how can people live like this?” Don’t get it twisted, living hood rich is an art. And for those of you who are still confused as to whether you are living hood rich, here are a couple of signs.

How to know if you are living HOOD RICH:

1. You throw your child a 1st birthday party that looks more like an adult cookout with liquor, ribs, dominos and spades. Your child just started teething; he ain’t biting into any half rack of ribs.

2. You car payment is more than your rent.

3. You take out student loans, not to pay for tuition, but to put speakers in your new car.

4. Your new lace front wig is paid for, but your babies Christmas is on lay-a-way.

5. All your bills are in the kids names. Let’s be real, their credit is better than yours.

These are only a few examples. Please feel free to share your thoughts.

Keep it Real Family,

Disclaimer: While this article does discuss the hood rich lifestyle of a few individuals I have run into during my years here on earth, it is not an encompassing view of women or men receiving public assistance or child support.

Posted by Southern Comfort