Que Será Será

Status: The relative position or standing of things or especially persons in a

society.

In 2010 status is not enough. Oh you didn't know? We need something to symbolically represent our economic or social status. We need status symbols. We drive big cars, own big houses, get courtside seats for game 7 and add titles behind our name. Theses external denotations of one's social position are what many work tirelessly to secure.

"There is a strange race of people described as spending their lives doing things they detest, to make money they don’t want, to buy things they don’t need, to impress people they don’t like."
~ Emile Henry Gauvreau

Meet June. She is a strong 9, possible 10. She is single and has a B.A in Management. She has been labelled "the pretty one." June does not have many standards for her men but she does require “a nice car” and a few economic assets. Now I aint saying she a gold digger, but she aint messing with no broke ninjas. June meets a professional athlete at a sports bar and is immediately intrigued by his swagger. Her level of intrigue grows when he mentions his status as a professional football player. June insists she is attracted to men who have the ability to "take care of her" and not their money, cars, clothes or h*es. Word to T.I. June loves sports and comes from a family of many athletes so she knows many athletes but that is strictly a coincidence. She keeps up with stats and can have a decent conversation with even the most die-hard fans about any team in the league. June and the athlete exchange numbers and the rest is history.

Meet July. She is also a strong 9, possible 10 and is June's twin sister. She is also single and has a B.A in Finance. She has been labelled "the smart/ambitious one" and considers herself an independent woman. She spends her time working towards her master's. She is ambitious and the epitome of an overachiever. July meets a gentleman at the same bar who happens to be a PhD student. She is elated because her standards require her man to have a 4 year degree or better. July has only dated men in academia whom she has deemed her "intellectual equal." She has dismissed men who admit to dropping out of college to pursue other interests. She is attracted to said gentleman but is more intrigued when she learns of his status as a PhD student. They chat for hours on end. July and. Mr. PhD exchange numbers and the rest is history.

Note: This does not imply that ambitious women like July cannot be a reformed or more subtle version of June. Nor does it imply that the male version of June and July do not exist. Keep your eyes open.

I wont ask you to admit whether you are June or July because a little piece of them is inside most women. Don’t act like its just me. Dont act like you have never lusted after a celebrity. I’m Belvedere. That means you can keep it real with me even when you’re lying to yourself. Don’t get it twisted, I’m dont want a man who will ask me to call him daddy (thats the nastiest sh*t in the milky way galaxy) but I do pray for a man who is financially and mentally stable enough such that we can enjoy life comfortably. BUT I refuse to settle for any less than my reasonable standards so I am prepared like Rick Ross to hustle everyday and take care of myself 100%. I can do bad all by myself. There is a menacingly thin line between worrying about your future and only staying with someone for their resources.
Before you pass judgment some of you already have, remember there are women with several degrees who refuse to even have lunch with (let alone date) a respectable, loving, well-read sanitation engineer, because she has deemed him below her level. On the other hand, you have men like Slim Thugg who tragically believe their two cents is worth more than that and decide to apply his blanket generalizations about women based on the ‘rats he has gotten fleas from. But I digress.

My experiences have led me to believe our preferences are just another excuse to date someone because of their status. This goes for Mr. a$$ man as much as it goes for Mrs. "I only date black men." The list also encompasses Mrs. "I only date athletes" as much as it includes Mrs. "I wont date you because you drive a 95 Accord in 2010." Mr. "I only date women who remind me of my mother" is also on said list. *side eye* We are all entitled to have our standards but where do we draw the line between rediculous and rational? After we sort through all the cowsh*t excuses, its all preferences and generalizations. Maybe the "have-nots (as in I have-not the things to attract a quality spouse)" are the only ones complaining.

Look, I'm not asking you to live a subservient lifestyle. Nor am I asking you to bash gold diggers. If gold diggers are your cup o tea, then sip til you reach the bottom of the cup. What you eat doesnt make me poop. If it walks, talks and acts like a gold digger then I say milk him/her and let him/her milk you. Does that mean get caught up in the hype? Heck no. Dont go into debt, ruin your relationships, risk your health with surgical enhancements or lose yourself trying to attract people who see you as dispensable.

What is the difference between June and July? Is there a difference? Is a woman who dates a man for his status as a professional athlete really different from a woman who dates a man because of his academic credentials or his car or his shoes??

“To live is to choose. But to choose well, you must know who you are and what you stand for, where you want to go and why you want to get there.”~ Kofi Annan

Whats your status? Do you have a problem with someone who wants to date you solely because of what you have? For the fellas do you tend to attract a June or a July or a mixture of both?

Inquiring minds want to know.

...and so it was written.

















Posted by Belvedere